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Did you know about the CIA's DECADES-LONG FUNDING of Coca-Cola? I have a hot tip from my good friend the soda machine technician that the CIA regularly funnels
by AdmiralAsshat 28d ago
Did you know about the CIA's DECADES-LONG FUNDING of Coca-Cola? I have a hot tip from my good friend the soda machine technician that the CIA regularly funnels THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS a month into the pockets of BIG SODA when they restock their office kitchens and vending machines with Coca-Cola products!
This insidious relationship goes ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP, my friend!
- AndrewKemendo 28d agoIt’s a good point I’m not sure why we shouldn’t hold other brands accountable for their public relations. I served a long time and if no pizza place would deliver to a military base because they were protesting military action, it would have actually made an impact. To what degree is unknown but I know every dominos in a 20 mile radius from our base was on call to deliver 8000 pizzas from time to time. That aint nothing
- deleted 28d ago[deleted]
- kphorn 28d agoThe Civil Reserve Pizza fleet always amazed me. About once a quarter, the Air Force Academy would get dominoes pizza for all 4000 cadets. every cadet + staff and some visitors gets a medium pizza for dinner. that's about 4000 pizzas stuffed into the back seats of honda civics from around colorado springs arriving in a 2 hour span. I dont know how they did it but boy could they mobilize
- goalieca 28d agoWe used to have pizza day at my elementary school and every kid would get their own personal sized dominos pizza. It's impressive how they can deliver on 600+ pizzas all warm and delivered at the same time.
- deleted 28d ago[deleted]
- blipvert 28d agoNever underestimate the bandwidth of a fully laden Honda Civic
- bell-cot 28d agoGoogle Maps has 16 Dominoes locations around Colorado Springs. 4000 means each location is making about 125 pizza/hour for 2 hours. (For just the Academy.) Google's AI figures that doing pizzas assembly-line style, a pizzeria can make about 30 pizzas per employee per hour. Unless the Academy is hitting them with surprise orders, it doesn't sound too challenging. Anyone here been in this space, to talk specifics?
- AndrewKemendo 28d agoIt is surprise orders often At least back in 2003-2004 there would be some random thing happen and make it impossible to get the staff on the hill So they would do these massive dominos orders
- jorvi 28d agoDominos uses a special dough that allows them to make a pizza in like 5 (?) minutes. Before COVID, for a few years the Dominos in my city had a policy where they'd deliver the pizza to your door in 20 minutes or the pizza would be free. This led to a lot of traffic accidents so eventually they had to stop :+)
- uxp100 27d agoDoesn’t take a special dough to achieve that.
- dunham 27d agoYeah, just the right oven. It took 90 seconds for pizza hacker in SF on a customized weber grill: https://www.mikesenese.com/DOIT/2010/05/wood-fired-pizza-on-the-pizzaforge-bbq-oven-with-pizzahacker/ https://www.mikesenese.com/DOIT/2010/05/wood-fired-pizza-on-...
- xoxxala 28d agoI used to work for Domino's Pizza in the mid to late 80s. Our piemakers were trained for speed and could usually slap dough, sauce, cheese and throw down toppings in around 30-40 seconds per pie. The ovens were super hot and cooked pizzas in 3-4 minutes. The whole goal was to get the pizza out the door so the driver didn't have to speed. This was still during the "30 minutes or less or it's free" period. Our franchisee held competitions between stores to see how fast employees could make six large pepperonis. Winning times were less than two minutes. And it wasn't just slop, the pies had to met a minimum quality level (proper saucing and cheesing, the right number of pepperoni slices per pie). I helped out occasionally at a store in Garden Grove by Disneyland that often did ~1500 pizzas on Friday nights. And as a DUMP (Dayshift Manager), did a few 40-50 pie lunch orders by myself, with a couple drivers helping out on ovens, for schools or companies. Stores kept daily records so knew how many employees to schedule based on past sales - pizza sales were surprisingly consistent over time. And we required advance notice for the really big orders so we could schedule appropriately.
- AndrewKemendo 28d agoYeah that’s my school
- krrrh 28d agoIt’s a free country. This sort of boycott would just result in Black Rifle Pizza.
- kennywinker 28d agoBlack Riffle Coffee was founded because Starbucks pledged to hire 10,000 refugees, not because they boycotted the military. The moral of the story as I see it is: not acting because you don't want a backlash is a loosing game - they'll find a reason to backlash anyway.
- BryantD 27d agoWasn’t even that — Black Rifle was founded in 2014 and the Starbucks announcement was in 2017. Note that as of 2025, they only have 500 total employees. Which I think only proves your moral harder. (I don’t have this at my fingertips, I just happen to be driving through Montana and my wife asked me about the Black Rifle Coffee billboards so I literally just read the Wikipedia article a couple of hours ago.)
- kennywinker 27d agoYou’re totally right, my mistake. Founded in 2014, gained popularity in 2017 for pledging to hire 10,000 veterans because starbucks said they’d hire 10,000 refugees. According to wikipedia only ~150 of their ~500 employees are vets. The thing is that both of these are cynical pledges. I’m not like yay starbucks on this - i’m sure they were doing it for the PR and because refugees are easily exploited workers. It’s one of the things I hate about reactionary backlashes - by creating “sides”, i find myself on a side with people i don’t want to be on a side with because the other side is dumber
- somenameforme 27d agoI find it useful to always take a step back and point out that both sides are dumb. Though it often ends up with both sides hating you instead of only one, but ya know.. https://allthatsinteresting.com/august-landmesser https://allthatsinteresting.com/august-landmesser
- refurb 27d agoIf you think government geopolitical policy could be disrupted by a lack of pizza delivery i can assure you it’s not.
- hbn 28d agoThey're putting poison in the sugar water!
- Telemakhos 27d agoMy exgf was adamant that aspartame (in Diet Coke) was a mind control drug. Turns out that Donald Rumsfeld (of Bush administration fame) was CEO of the company that made it, and he was the one who got the FDA to approve it for human consumption. So, there is a conspiracy theory not far from your joke.
- lofaszvanitt 27d agoCoffee and Tea is the mind control drug.
- rl3 28d agoYour satire probably isn't that far off: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sinaltrainal_v._Coca-Cola_Co https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sinaltrainal_v._Coca-Cola_Co. https://www.pbs.org/frontlineworld/fellows/colombia0106/index.html https://www.pbs.org/frontlineworld/fellows/colombia0106/inde...
- DANmode 28d agoI was also going to mention this - unfortunate example they chose!
- jimt1234 28d agoWhoa. This is weird. My friend's dad was an FBI agent for over 20 years. I remember him telling us a story about a case he worked in the early-90s where a Coca Cola exec was embezzling millions from the company. The exec was caught, basically red-handed. After working with his lawyer, the exec provided a story about some South American gang that strong-armed him into washing money for them (threatened to kill him and his family; I think he said they even kidnapped his daughter). My friend's dad said his team worked with the exec for several months to corroborate the story about the South American gang. Apparently he was telling the truth. Then, after gathering intel on the gang, they came up with a plan to go after them. However, a few days before they were set to act on their plan, they were told to stand down. Actually, no, before that they were told by their leadership that there would be no capture (of the gang), only kill. Then the plan was cancelled altogether. My friend's dad rarely, if ever, talked about his work. However, he got loose lips after retiring, and if he had a few beers in him.
- leonidasrup 28d agoMore like CIA decades long funding of Crypto AG, Swiss company specialising in communications and information security. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crypto_AG https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crypto_AG
- pessimizer 28d agoI don't think this is a good reply to a very funny and appropriate comment, but it's always important to keep mentioning that the CIA probably definitely murdered the founder's son: https://inteltoday.org/2020/02/15/crypto-ag-was-boris-hagelin-jr-murdered-by-the-cia/ https://inteltoday.org/2020/02/15/crypto-ag-was-boris-hageli...
- Duwensatzaj 27d ago> Although there is — yet — no evidence That’s a far cry from “probably definitely”.
- Spooky23 28d agoDefinitely a great candidate for being a intelligence agencies resource, either cooperatively or without their knowledge. They have a ridiculously large network for their vending machines, and a massive global footprint.
- svat 27d agoAs documented in Dr. Strangelove: https://youtu.be/DUAK7t3Lf8s https://youtu.be/DUAK7t3Lf8s
- prolly97 27d agoHaha, "follow the money!"