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Bumble has been great to use as a college student, especially during covid. I know a lot of you are married so let me put this out here: I (and most young peop
by Goosee 6y ago
Bumble has been great to use as a college student, especially during covid.
I know a lot of you are married so let me put this out here: I (and most young people) will not put their romantic life on pause cause of a virus. Every dating app got an influx of people due to bordem from lockdowns.
I'm biased towards (investing in) bumble because it has anecdotally acted as the best dating 'middleman' compared to tinder/hinge. I've had only great experiences taking bumble girls on dates.
Compared to tinder, bumble has more serious people looking to date. The system is set up so girls message first and matches will expire after 24 hr. When a girl messages you first, she is already more invested in getting to you know than when a guy using a cheesy pickup line on tinder.
I've always loved the philosophy bumble took to the dating scene compared to the apps part of $MTCH.
- actuator 6y agoSurprising. Out of the three you mentioned I like Hinge to be the neatest one in terms of idea, although the worst app out of the three. The prompt/photo comments approach allows for a better conversation starter than bios IMO. Also, being able to see who is liking you by default is much better. Way back when I used Bumble, a lot of girls used to drop 'Hi!'(double standards), and never bothered to reply to my reply which felt very annoying to say the least. I would wish every dating app to add a simple feature, if the other person is active on the dating app and isn't responding to you, just unmatch the pair say after two/three days of the last message. I don't understand what's the purpose of just being a name/chat on someone's list.
- ralston3 6y ago> just unmatch the pair say after three days of the last message. This is a good point. However, some women (due to men spamming them) don't have notifications turned on, so genuinely don't get around to seeing a message until they have time to sit down and scroll through the pile Also (as I'm sure you know), anything that can be used as a "measure of cool" will be used as just that. And having a huge list of matches can be a huge self-esteem boost to some. I agree with your point though. It can be tiresome to have to periodically clean out matches every so often
- actuator 6y ago> However, some women (due to men spamming them) don't have notifications turned on That's why I wrote "if the other person is active on the dating app and isn't responding to you, just unmatch the pair say after" > anything that can be used as a "measure of cool" will be used as just that. Agreed. I have been guilty of this as well, though I also do realize that it is still a human being at the other end and giving a closure by unmatching is much better than leaving it hanging. > It can be tiresome to have to periodically clean out matches every so often I think more than cleaning out the matches, if you were interested in someone and were having a conversation with them and suddenly they disappear, you don't know if that's just because of being busy. The delay might be just anxiousness for the other person.
- Goosee 6y agoYeah the two things I liked about using hinge: 1. You can comment&like a pic/prompt that the other person will see 2. Girls can 'invite you' to initiate the conversation Ultimately the types of girls to use bumble in my college, home town, and when traveling aligned with the types of girls I like. I know hinge is super popular in major cities like LA/NYC. But in the suburbs of SoCal 90%ish of hinge girls seemed socially awkward and I did not find their pics/writing prompts attractive. Yeah girls do tend to drop 'hi! :)' on bumble. You just have to be clever when responding to it. I treat it as she is signaling me to make the 'opening move' which sets the tone of the whole conversation. You can always unmatch (on any dating app) if the conversation stales. At least bumble unmatches if the guy does not respond to the girl in 24 hours.
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- vegannet 6y agoI agree wholeheartedly that Bumble is the dating app for relationships — and it’s the app I recommend! — but from a financials perspective: casual dating is much more profitable, Bumble will always be far behind Tinder on revenue — so as much as I love Bumble, I’d question the room for revenue growth it has vs. tinder.
- snarf21 6y agoBumble will be bought by PE and sold to MATCH. Anyone want to take that wager?
- tempsy 6y agolol it was already bought by PE and now going public Blackstone owns it.
- polote 6y agoIf this legally possible, that will happen 100%, the match group business is to buy any significant competitor, and they tried in the past to buy Bumble.
- mandeepj 6y ago> the match group business is to buy any significant competitor, and they tried in the past to buy Bumble. Bumble founder was an executive at Match group. She was sexually assaulted. Why she would sell it to them - only to go back to a horror show?
- smnrchrds 6y agoWill the founder maintain a voting majority in the enterprise after it goes public? If not, she won't be able to prevent it, no matter how much she is against it.
- kjakm 6y ago>> I know a lot of you are married so let me put this out here: I (and most young people) will not put their romantic life on pause cause of a virus. Most people I know have put their dating lives on hold. Not all of course, but most. It’s like any of the rules people have been asked to follow during the past year: most people have followed them, it’s only a selfish minority that have not. Edit: My point is not to excuse shitty behaviour by pretending everyone else is doing it. Consider the world doesn't revolve around you and that occasionally people need to work together for the greater good, each making a variety of sacrifices.
- actuator 6y agoAlthough I agree with the sentiment, it is harsh to say this. I am in my 20s as well and can see where he is coming from. I have not gone out on dates this past year and it feels bad. 20s are the prime dating years, it feels like a year was taken out where I aged but my life hasn't moved. To make things worse, the whole staying at your home thing has made the desire of having a relationship even more strong as the alone periods do hit you hard. Though to put things in perspective, a lot of people had it way worse than just their dating life/travel being disrupted.
- kjakm 6y agoI understand - I'm also in my 20's. It sucks. A lot. But we're not the only people having to sacrifice and hopefully things get back to normal soon! It's tough but I don't think anyone will regret doing the right thing and hopefully we'll appreciate life a bit more afterwards.
- actuator 6y agoYeah, I agree. I think we are going to see changes in dating attitudes after this. At least in my circle of friends and extended circle, I have seen the desire for serious relationships go stronger in this period. Also, the appreciation for family for those who were able to live with them.
- ndiscussion 6y ago
- ryanlol 6y agoTinder on the other hand has been completely ruined in big cities thanks to this free “tinder passport” thing. Browsing Tinder in Westminster with the search distance set to the lowest possible, half the people you see are 1000s of miles away.
- tomc1985 6y agoWhat is even the point of tinder passport? Unless you're ready to hop on a plane and go fuck your match halfway across the world why even bother? Is it for all the people hoping to hook up when they arrive at their vacation spot?
- WildGreenLeave 6y agoI matched with a girl and am dating her. She lives in Amsterdam while I am on the other side of the country. Why? Because I am planning on moving there so why would I try to find a relationship at my current location. Furthermore, I've used it plenty of times before traveling to set it to a country where I will be going. I am very clear about not wanting a hookup and just meet up with locals and that has been working quite well. Not everything is about having a hookup.
- vmception 6y agoFor reference for anyone else, the farthest extreme of the mainland Netherlands from Amsterdam is 130 miles away, a 2 hour drive.
- randycupertino 6y agoPer my single friend, there's a lot of people on there looking to cheat on their partners while they business travel. She's gotten so many hits from men visiting SF on business trips claiming to live there full time and/or be single and then sees their families on facebook. Kind of soured her on online dating.
- nikanj 6y agoAt least on my Tinder: 1) A small number of desperate people in poor countries trying to score a way out. Marriage is one of the rare ways for unskilled people from the 3rd world to get legal residence in the 1st world 2) Tons and tons of crypto scammers. So many crypto scammers. "I'm actually in Hong Kong right now. I made tons of money investing in $ponzi, and now I'm a free agent. You should make an account too, then we can travel together!"
- polote 6y ago> Compared to tinder, bumble has more serious people looking to date Not really true, Bumble engages in less shitty behavior than Tinder, so they don't prevent you to match with the people who are compatible with you basically. Which is more likely to create a serious relationships. But the 24hr thing for matching doesnt work anymore, that just eliminates girls who only want more followers on insta. But yeah overall the app works better than Tinder, because Tinder needs to capture as much money as possible from their user to be the most profitable as possible. Bumble doesn't have to, at least it didnt have to, now that they become public, they will become as bad
- bogomipz 6y ago>"Not really true, Bumble engages in less shitty behavior than Tinder, so they don't prevent you to match with the people who are compatible with you basically." Can you elaborate on this? What is Tinder doing in this respect? How does preventing matching compatible people allow them to capture more profit?
- polote 6y agoThe more a user match with compatible people the more likely they will settle in an exclusive relationship, and thus quit Tinder, and thus quit being a paying customer. So if you want more recurring paying customers, prevent them to meet with compatible people ;) What they do ? Show you attractive girls but don't show your profile to them. Keep a 90/10 ratio of men to women on the app. Make you feel like there is an endless list of people to meet and all better than others. Tell you you have 99+ waiting likes (when in fact thats only the girls who liked you but you didnt like). Dont limit the number of guys that a girls can match. Dont delete matches that are inactive (push you to collect matches). Almost force you to choose a long term membership instead of a month, ...
- bogomipz 6y agoWow, that's pretty rotten. So has Bumble taken the opposite approach that although they will lose customer who have successfully met someone on the app those same people are also likely to recommend Bumble?
- jariel 6y agoThere's no reason ladies can't message first on Tinder. The mechanism is still there.
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- paul7986 6y agoPer my experience..I agree about Bumble and I'll add Match as the only dating apps worth using! Apps where if both like each other there's a 80 to 90 percent chance you will actually start conversing, getting to know each other, talking offline and going on a date or dates. In my experience...Facebook Dating is just a like factory in which people aren't seriously looking rather boosting their ego or have a huge list to filter through even if they liked you the conversations doesn't go far(I only continue a conversation if she asks about me too). It's definitely not a dating app to find women who are serious about dating. Overall during Covid I've had more dates then usual. Women are out there looking and dating at least here in the suburbs/rurual areas of MD and PA; restaurants are open for outside and inside dining.
- fasdf1122 6y agoFrom my experience, as someone who is very active in the dating scene - almost no guys I know use bumble exclusively or even as their primary dating platform. Most prefer Tinder/Hinge because it allows them more control over their dates/matches (i.e they can put in more time/work to get more dates) whereas Bumble is more of a passive experience. It's used as more of a "bonus" or "extra".
- tricolon 6y agoI think it's highly dependent on where you are. This is my experience of the three... Hinge: I talk to people, and sometimes that leads to a date Tinder: I talk to people, but no dates happen Bumble: Nothing happens.
- 3327 6y agoSo basically you are scoring and now Its covid so you can save the dinner money too! what is The company worth?
- verst 6y ago> Compared to tinder, bumble has more serious people looking to date. The system is set up so girls message first and matches will expire after 24 hr. When a girl messages you first, she is already more invested in getting to you know than when a guy using a cheesy pickup line on tinder. This is an overly optimistic take that I cannot confirm. The first messages received on Bumble are either "hey/hi" or a GIF that is typically a waving bear with the word "hello". That is despite profile text and images with dozens of things that could spark a conversation or question. In fact, most people never read my thoughtfully crafted profile - there certainly is no investment in getting to know me. Instead my reply is expected to be creative/funny or the conversation will end, essentially making this conversation no different from Tinder. In my experience the typical Bumble user in major metro areas wants to date, but not with long term in mind. If that isn't important to you, fair enough. As an aside, I also find that Bumble has less diversity than other apps - racially, socioeconomically etc Given Tinder and Bumble I vastly preferred Tinder. Tinder has far more users of every kind of background with every imaginable kind of intention. The key is to be intentional in your profile or your first messages about what you are looking for and move on if it is a mismatch. I know how to identify a Tinder profile that is a good mutual match for me, but I definitely will get tendonitis from swiping left in the process of locating such a profile. If you save your free daily super like for that person and assuming you are introspective enough to accurately assess whether this person will be interested in you you have a high chance of being seen and matching. If you would like to date seriously without it feeling forced or desperate I highly recommend Coffee Meets Bagel (if you are in an area where this app is being used). It never takes me long to find someone wonderful there that makes me want to quit all apps. In my experience, no matter what you are looking for, Bumble isn't your best choice for any of those things.
- oxygenjoe 6y agoIn 2017 when I was single I got vastly more matches and responses when I changed my bio from actual information to a stupid joke about phil collins
- volkk 6y agoyep. me too. i think it's a demographic thing, but i remember when i stopped taking it seriously is when i had the utmost success. i guess that's just the moral of living in general
- e15ctr0n 6y agoThere was a reality TV show on Netflix where people were looking to matchmakers to help them find someone to marry. The only participant who did end up getting married found her guy through Bumble.
- llampx 6y agoYou're taking that as data? A reality show?
- tristor 6y agoI haven't been in the dating market for over 3 years, since I met my girlfriend on Coffee Meets Bagel, but I used a lot of different dating apps prior and in numerous cities around the world. My experience was that Bumble was exactly like Tinder, except that on Bumble I had a lower match rate, but a slightly higher rate of matches resulting in an actual conversation. I found no difference whatsoever in the "seriousness" of the people involved. Most people were using Bumble for hookups. Maybe that's changed, but I honestly believe the only dating app currently available that's actually worth using if you want a relationship and not a hookup is Coffee Meets Bagel. I had more and higher quality dates, including meeting my now 3+ year girlfriend, on CMB than any other app.
- neurobashing 6y ago> I know a lot of you are married so let me put this out here: I (and most young people) will not put their romantic life on pause cause of a virus. I'm Gen X, I came of age the last time there was a virus going around that had potentially lethal repercussions if you got it. We didn't stop dating. We took reasonable precautions. To be blunt, you didn't raw-dog someone you just met. Only fools expect you to abstain for years. Only fools look at a person and think "well they _look_ healthy, I'm probably OK."
- Goosee 6y agoExactly, thank you for this. I should have been more clear. I view this as risk vs reward. I minimize unnecessary interactions so I can for example, go on a date and not be worried.
- wolfretcrap 6y agoOnline dating has never worked for me. In a month i got 3 matches out of which 2 were looking for just friends and needless to say there was no relationship potential there. After this I gave up and just accepted the fact I might be sooo ugly to get any matches on online dating websites. And I don't approach women in real life either now because honestly if there's no common courtesy online and then I get no interest, in real life people just giving me response out of courtesy.
- ChrisIsTaken 6y agoUnsolicited life advice: People in middle age that choose to travel solo are open minded, a bit lonely, and are completely dissatisfied with all of the "normal" social bullshit.
- leetcrew 6y agoit seems that as a man, online dating just doesn't work well unless you're very attractive and/or good at putting together an attractive set of photos (not the same thing!). don't let that put you off talking to new people IRL though. dating sites tend to give you an unrealistically low impression of your attractiveness. before the pandemic, I used to go out to local bars a few times a month for dinner and a drink. I was mostly focused on eating, but more often than not whoever was sitting nearby would start a conversation with me, some of them very attractive women who I'm sure would have swiped left on me without a moment's hesitation. keep in mind, all dating failures stem from one or both of the following: unreasonable expectations and simply not talking to enough new people. both are within your power to change.
- chrisseaton 6y ago> but more often than not whoever was sitting nearby would start a conversation with me, some of them very attractive women who I'm sure would have swiped left on me without a moment's hesitation I don't think these are the same thing. Swiping right is expressing a positive attraction and intent to go out for a date. Having a conversation in a bar is just... having a conversation. People do that with anyone and everyone. It doesn't mean any attraction at all.
- jxramos 6y agoThis is pretty fascinating, girls message first, girls take the initiative. Sort of changes the incentives for the guys to up their game and present a really solid profile or whatever and take silence as their feedback without dragging others into the mix having to be silent. Like the difference between targeted silence and anonymous silence. This just might work, apparently it does.