Jem

5 ms·

1.
by Jem 11y ago
Do you want to learn all of those because you have a genuine interest in doing so, or do you want to learn all of those things because you feel you "should"? I browse HN and read comments and articles I do not even begin to unders
2.
by Jem 11y ago
This is just a thin site containing lists of affiliate links. It'd be much more useful if you had actually compared the tools you're linking to and/or ranked or rated them on the functionality they offer.
3.
by Jem 11y ago
"wogrammer"? Really? If there's one thing I don't need (as a woman in tech) it's segregation further from your regular joe programmer. Show me what other women are achieving - FANTASTIC - but quit with the bloody ri
4.
by Jem 11y ago
IMO it's not about avoiding disagreement - I think that modelling appropriate 'conflict' resolution is important for kids - but rather making sure that kids DON'T learn that the easy way to get a 'yes' is to as
5.
by Jem 11y ago
Do your friends lack a backbone? I'm not sure why one has to equal the other. Obviously I can't say for sure that had my parents done X, I would have done Y, but their lack of any attempt to connect with my siblings and I on any m
6.
by Jem 11y ago
Anecdotally, if I'd thought of my parents as friends, I perhaps would have been more inclined to tell them that I was being abused as a child. I (personally) would rather blur the lines between friendship and authority and have my chil
7.
by Jem 11y ago
Not sure that necessitates you being less playful - just back your wife up so that you come across as a team, rather than two individuals who can be played off as each other? It's not a bad thing that your child has found a friend in y
8.
by Jem 11y ago
I'm not really sure what your point is?
9.
by Jem 11y ago
My poor misunderstood British sense of humour :)
10.
by Jem 11y ago
Yes, you're right. All male progammers are in it for the tinkering and the women are just in it for the money.
11.
by Jem 11y ago
My mortgage is £477 p/m on a small 2 bedroom semi-detached house. To rent I'd be looking at ~£600p/m for a small 2 bedroom flat (apartment). I'd still have to pay the same utilities etc so wouldn't be better off by
12.
by Jem 11y ago
Hard to say. As a stay at home mum I felt unfulfilled and lonely. In the early years of returning to work full time I felt guilty for leaving my child in daycare. Working at home (with a mix of juggling kids and some daycare) I felt isolate
13.
by Jem 11y ago
Private renting in my area (as with a lot of places in the UK) would be more costly than my current mortgage. I didn't think you were criticising parents who use childcare, least of all me, but I do feel it's necessary for people
14.
by Jem 11y ago
I would be homeless, first and foremost, because I wouldn't be able to pay my mortgage and the bank would seize my assets. Eventually I would be eligible for state benefits and placed on a waiting list for a council owned property, but
15.
by Jem 11y ago
For me, not using childcare == not working, which means I'd probably lose my home. I'm not sure that risk is worth it.
16.
by Jem 11y ago
Are there any studies on working father's impact on children? (A quick google returns a few studies on father's impact but not working ones specifically.) Damned if you do, damned if you don't. If you work, you're a negl
17.
by Jem 11y ago
Despite this, I had my geek code proudly displayed on my website for years! :) (d- for appearance, although less so these days.)
18.
by Jem 12y ago
I too can read anyone like a book, and I'd never really thought about why before but my mum also had a temper and I grew up with 2 separate abusers and left home to a 3rd. I've never considered it a skill before, or indeed realise
19.
by Jem 12y ago
No, but I've been one of just a small handful of women at a dev conference and it can be incredibly intimidating. On the plus side, the queues for the loos are always short. ;)
20.
by Jem 12y ago
This reminds me of when I go out running at night. I avoid running near men (particularly groups of men) because of a fear that I'll come to harm: specifically rape. It's irrational, and unreasonable, but it's the reaction I
21.
by Jem 12y ago
I also have children, and I'm not sure how it's relevant. Of course you SHOULD be able to tell someone you're offended without the risk of backlash, but it's always a risk. Clearly Adria decided to handle that risk in a
22.
by Jem 12y ago
I know what she did. I didn't say I agreed with her approach (quite the opposite, in fact).
23.
by Jem 12y ago
Totally agree with your first 3 sentences, can't agree with the last. Finding the courage to stand up and directly address someone who is making you feel uncomfortable - especially if you're a minority in a certain environment - t
24.
by Jem 12y ago
I get that, and I empathise for Adria, but Hank isn't the perpetrator of the abuse. It's the direction of Adria's anger that shocked me, not that she's angry.
25.
by Jem 12y ago
When I was ~17, I was cast out of an online community that I had been working in/with for around 3-4 years. Overnight I lost my hobby, my so-called friends, and my entire personal life was examined in detail and revealed to the public
26.
by Jem 12y ago
I remember when this incident happened. I can't remember what my reaction was at the time (probably a combination of "let's not alienate women in tech further" and "sexual jokes are OK in the right context, and a co
27.
Jon Ronson: How a Tweet Can Ruin Your Life(esquire.co.uk)
424 points by Jem 12y ago|506 comments
28.
by Jem 12y ago
Really? How active a part do you play in your child's life? Because much of my non-work time is spent caring for my children. Even when they're asleep or not in the house, I am doing things for them or because of them.
29.
by Jem 12y ago
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=9095120
30.
by Jem 12y ago
See: Negative SEO (Although Google denies it's a problem.)

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