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> The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. Fewer. Everyone will always have some dependencies and needs. Personally,
by mathgeek 11d ago
> The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs.
Fewer. Everyone will always have some dependencies and needs.
Personally, I pity anyone who sees a desire to be loved as a weakness. That’s quite literally a lesson taught as a trope about being a good person vs an evil one.
- zkmon 11d agoBeing loved is not a weakness. But a strong requirement to be loved is a weakness because that means you don't have strength to be happy without being loved.
- rhyperior 11d agoAnd that perspective presumes that being loved isn’t a fundamental human need.
- bluGill 11d agoLove is extremely common. It is not particularly much of a weakness because there are plenty of people who will love you. Now, finding that person, or those people, depending on exactly what it means, that could be hard. There are also a lot of people who will abuse your need for love, and so you do have to be careful.
- ElProlactin 11d agoThis is actually a sad comment. How did you ever come to believe that wanting to feel loved, which is a fundamental desire (if not "need") for the vast majority of human beings, could ever be construed as a weakness resulting from a lack of "strength"?
- derf_ 11d agoTo steel-man their argument, I think what they are trying to describe is https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anxious-preoccupied_attachment https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anxious-preoccupied_attachment vs. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secure_attachment https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secure_attachment
- ElProlactin 11d agoBut your steel-man actually proves my point: people who have insecure attachment commonly develop such an attachment style as a result of their childhood relationships with their caregivers. It has absolutely nothing to do with being "strong" versus "weak". Under your steel-man, someone who is anxious-avoidant could appear very independent and therefore "strong" even though they are struggling inside.
- khazhoux 11d agoA rock feels no pain. And an island never cries.
- AnimalMuppet 11d agoA rock never feels anything. That's the price, and it's a very steep one.
- teaearlgraycold 11d agoCharitably interpreted, GP is already loved and takes it for granted while arguing about a straw man. Or perhaps GP is specifically talking about someone who has trouble loving themself without a romantic partner.
- pzo 11d agoHow then about monks or priests? I wouldn't clasify them as all of them being sad or having a fundamental need to be loved. Also loved can have different meaning - mostly people think about family and partners. There is also community.
- mlyle 11d agoEating is not a weakness. But a strong requirement to eat is a weakness because you don't have the strength to be happy without eating.
- SomeoneOnTheWeb 11d agoI would actually argue that eating is a weakness, that every single human (and animals in general) just happen to share.
- flexagoon 11d agoIsn't that true? Not being able to live without eating is, in fact, a weakness, just a very common one.