8 ms·

As a white guy with a (very mildly) African American sounding name, I have had similar experiences. When I meet people in person after emailing them they someti

by jrells 11y ago

As a white guy with a (very mildly) African American sounding name, I have had similar experiences. When I meet people in person after emailing them they sometimes seem surprised, and some later admit they expected me to be black. The worst example was when I was told by someone renting a room on craigslist that they couldn't rent to me because I was a "security threat", even though I had hardly said anything about myself. It must be tough for those who face that kind of attitude constantly and are unable to escape it.

deleted 11y ago
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- zxcvcxz 11y ago
  Not that guy, but I've considered changing my name so it sounds more exotic and unique. From what I've seen, people with "generic" or biblical names don't seem to get chosen as often as they used to when it comes to academic and prestigious stuff. It would be nice if people could use two or three names legally. Like when you use multiple emails.
  - amyjess 11y ago
    I was born with an uncommon last name. It caused me a lot of distress because nobody could properly spell or pronounce it. I had electric bills come in with my last name misspelled. My apartment complex had to tear up a lease and reprint it because they misspelled my last name (I caught it before I signed it, fortunately), and I'd been living there for over half a decade when that happened. Edit: it was also a variant form of an ethnic slur (you can thank bigoted Ellis Island officials for sticking my ancestor with the name), which made me really uncomfortable. I hated it. Last year, I had it legally changed. I was changing my first and middle names anyway (as part of my gender transition), so I threw in a new last name in as well (where I live, it doesn't cost any more or require any more paperwork to change your whole name than it does to change just the first and middle). My new last name is a monosyllabic word that's in the dictionary, refers to a common household object, and has no variant spellings. I've never been happier with my name. > It would be nice if people could use two or three names legally. Like when you use multiple emails. As long as you're not trying to defraud people, you can use as many aliases as you want. Of course, you'll still have to use your official name when dealing with the government, but there are companies who will respect aliases and use your chosen alias for all purposes except tax reporting.
    - nashashmi 11y ago
      Wow. I actually remember you commenting on the Ross Ulbricht story and you gave an explanation of how you changed your name.
beachstartup 11y ago
of course they can escape it. they just have to change their name. that's what my family did for me, and what i will do for my kids if i have kids. as far as i'm concerned if you have serious professional ambitions in the US, you're being foolish if you keep an 'ethnic' sounding name. keeping your disadvantageous name and arrogantly shaking your fist at the world to change to suit your political tastes is insane to me.
- deleted 11y ago
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- foldr 11y ago
  I think the point is that the name is disadvantageous because it makes people think that he's black, and black people cannot stop being black. In other words, if you're actually black, then you can't escape racism just by changing your name. I'm not sure what you mean by "political tastes". I'd have thought pretty much everyone was opposed to e.g. refusing to rent an apartment to someone because of their name, or because you think that they're black.
  - beachstartup 11y ago
    > In other words, if you're actually black, then you can't escape racism just by changing your name. no shit sherlock. but changing your name to a neutral sounding one, no matter what your race, will get you in the door at a much higher rate, where you are actually able to present yourself and your abilities instead of having your resume, application, submission, or email summarily tossed in the trash for no reason other than prejudice. small advantages like this compound over time. small disadvantages also compound. it's an optimization, and a highly effective one at that, but nothing more, nothing less than that.
    - foldr 11y ago
      Changing your name might help, though it's sad that anyone should have to do this. I was replying because you (a) seemed to be missing the OP's point and (b) were coming close to blaming victims of racial discrimination for not changing their names.

by jrells 11y ago

deleted 11y ago

[deleted]

zxcvcxz 11y ago
Not that guy, but I've considered changing my name so it sounds more exotic and unique. From what I've seen, people with "generic" or biblical names don't seem to get chosen as often as they used to when it comes to academic and prestigious stuff. It would be nice if people could use two or three names legally. Like when you use multiple emails.
- amyjess 11y ago
  I was born with an uncommon last name. It caused me a lot of distress because nobody could properly spell or pronounce it. I had electric bills come in with my last name misspelled. My apartment complex had to tear up a lease and reprint it because they misspelled my last name (I caught it before I signed it, fortunately), and I'd been living there for over half a decade when that happened. Edit: it was also a variant form of an ethnic slur (you can thank bigoted Ellis Island officials for sticking my ancestor with the name), which made me really uncomfortable. I hated it. Last year, I had it legally changed. I was changing my first and middle names anyway (as part of my gender transition), so I threw in a new last name in as well (where I live, it doesn't cost any more or require any more paperwork to change your whole name than it does to change just the first and middle). My new last name is a monosyllabic word that's in the dictionary, refers to a common household object, and has no variant spellings. I've never been happier with my name. > It would be nice if people could use two or three names legally. Like when you use multiple emails. As long as you're not trying to defraud people, you can use as many aliases as you want. Of course, you'll still have to use your official name when dealing with the government, but there are companies who will respect aliases and use your chosen alias for all purposes except tax reporting.
  - nashashmi 11y ago
    Wow. I actually remember you commenting on the Ross Ulbricht story and you gave an explanation of how you changed your name.

beachstartup 11y ago

of course they can escape it. they just have to change their name. that's what my family did for me, and what i will do for my kids if i have kids. as far as i'm concerned if you have serious professional ambitions in the US, you're being foolish if you keep an 'ethnic' sounding name. keeping your disadvantageous name and arrogantly shaking your fist at the world to change to suit your political tastes is insane to me.

deleted 11y ago
[deleted]
foldr 11y ago
I think the point is that the name is disadvantageous because it makes people think that he's black, and black people cannot stop being black. In other words, if you're actually black, then you can't escape racism just by changing your name. I'm not sure what you mean by "political tastes". I'd have thought pretty much everyone was opposed to e.g. refusing to rent an apartment to someone because of their name, or because you think that they're black.
- beachstartup 11y ago
  > In other words, if you're actually black, then you can't escape racism just by changing your name. no shit sherlock. but changing your name to a neutral sounding one, no matter what your race, will get you in the door at a much higher rate, where you are actually able to present yourself and your abilities instead of having your resume, application, submission, or email summarily tossed in the trash for no reason other than prejudice. small advantages like this compound over time. small disadvantages also compound. it's an optimization, and a highly effective one at that, but nothing more, nothing less than that.
  - foldr 11y ago
    Changing your name might help, though it's sad that anyone should have to do this. I was replying because you (a) seemed to be missing the OP's point and (b) were coming close to blaming victims of racial discrimination for not changing their names.