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A little gem from the article: "It was an extremely ugly, long (2 years!) divorce hearing: it made the newspapers because of Bell’s allegations of “extreme crue

A little gem from the article: "It was an extremely ugly, long (2 years!) divorce hearing: it made the newspapers because of Bell’s allegations of “extreme cruelty” by Feynman, including the notion that he spent all of his waking hours either doing calculus and playing the bongos."

alexjeffrey 12y ago
if only we could all live in a world where the highest form of domestic abuse was calculus and playing drums.
- ceejayoz 12y ago
  It said "including", not "exclusively", and continued loud music is a well-known psychological torture used in detainee interrogation...
  - matchu 12y ago
    There's a big difference between blasting music in someone's face for hours and playing an instrument regularly.
- jimhefferon 12y ago
  At that time, in those jurisdictions, you could only get divorced under very precise circumstances. One of the few ways was for one spouse, typically the woman, to assert "extreme cruelty." I don't know any more about this divorce than anyone else here but I do know that at the time people did whatever it took to fit in the required "extreme" criteria.
  - CamperBob2 12y ago
    It was also a matter of mutual agreement; sometimes the husband and wife would agree to accuse each other of crap like that. You know you have terrible public policy when couples are incentivized to slander each other in order to separate amicably.
  - Turing_Machine 12y ago
    Another common ruse was setting up a fake adultery with the help of an accommodating friend. One spouse would take a picture of the other spouse and the friend coming out of a motel room. Instant grounds for divorce.
ewoodrich 12y ago
That quote omits the actual alleged "extreme cruelty": "...the appointee's wife was granted a divorce from him because of appointee's constantly working calculus problems in his head as soon as awake, while driving car, sitting in living room, and so forth, and that his one hobby was playing his African drums. His ex-wife reportedly testified that on several occasions when she unwittingly disturbed either his calculus or his drums he flew into a violent rage, during which time he attacked her, threw pieces of bric-a-brac about and smashed the furniture."
- hydroxylGroup 12y ago
  > during which time he attacked her Still sounds kind of vague. What, precisely, does the word "attacked" refer to?
  - cloudwalking 12y ago
    > threw pieces of bric-a-brac about and smashed the furniture.
    - hydroxylGroup 12y ago
      That would be a form of "threatening" or maybe "menacing", and yeah, it's intimidation, but I wouldn't count it as an attack.
      - knome 12y ago
        He attacked her, AND he threw bric-a-brak, AND he smashed furniture. Not attacked her by the last two, but in addition. The man was undoubtedly brilliant, spoke well and wrote well. I don't think it useful, or likely to be accurate, trying to presume his homelife based on his public appearance.
        hydroxylGroup 12y ago
        So, like maybe he gave her a black eye, and a fat lip? Did her clothes get ripped? Was there lasting evidence of a serious assault? Did he knock her down a flight of stairs, and the kick her the stomach until she shat blood? Or did he just kind of push her aside, or grab her by the wrist, and shove her around and yell a lot, after she stood in a doorway between him and his bongo drums? Did he overpower her and then hold her down and spit in her face? That might constitute serious psychological abuse, and then again maybe it might not be abuse at all according to some people. Maybe he put her over his knee and spanked her? (some people might enjoy that sort of thing at the time, and then complain loudly about it later) What does "attacked" mean?
deleted 12y ago
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alexjeffrey 12y ago

if only we could all live in a world where the highest form of domestic abuse was calculus and playing drums.

ceejayoz 12y ago
It said "including", not "exclusively", and continued loud music is a well-known psychological torture used in detainee interrogation...
- matchu 12y ago
  There's a big difference between blasting music in someone's face for hours and playing an instrument regularly.
jimhefferon 12y ago
At that time, in those jurisdictions, you could only get divorced under very precise circumstances. One of the few ways was for one spouse, typically the woman, to assert "extreme cruelty." I don't know any more about this divorce than anyone else here but I do know that at the time people did whatever it took to fit in the required "extreme" criteria.
- CamperBob2 12y ago
  It was also a matter of mutual agreement; sometimes the husband and wife would agree to accuse each other of crap like that. You know you have terrible public policy when couples are incentivized to slander each other in order to separate amicably.
- Turing_Machine 12y ago
  Another common ruse was setting up a fake adultery with the help of an accommodating friend. One spouse would take a picture of the other spouse and the friend coming out of a motel room. Instant grounds for divorce.

ewoodrich 12y ago

That quote omits the actual alleged "extreme cruelty": "...the appointee's wife was granted a divorce from him because of appointee's constantly working calculus problems in his head as soon as awake, while driving car, sitting in living room, and so forth, and that his one hobby was playing his African drums. His ex-wife reportedly testified that on several occasions when she unwittingly disturbed either his calculus or his drums he flew into a violent rage, during which time he attacked her, threw pieces of bric-a-brac about and smashed the furniture."

hydroxylGroup 12y ago
> during which time he attacked her Still sounds kind of vague. What, precisely, does the word "attacked" refer to?
- cloudwalking 12y ago
  > threw pieces of bric-a-brac about and smashed the furniture.
  - hydroxylGroup 12y ago
    That would be a form of "threatening" or maybe "menacing", and yeah, it's intimidation, but I wouldn't count it as an attack.
    - knome 12y ago
      He attacked her, AND he threw bric-a-brak, AND he smashed furniture. Not attacked her by the last two, but in addition. The man was undoubtedly brilliant, spoke well and wrote well. I don't think it useful, or likely to be accurate, trying to presume his homelife based on his public appearance.
      - hydroxylGroup 12y ago
        So, like maybe he gave her a black eye, and a fat lip? Did her clothes get ripped? Was there lasting evidence of a serious assault? Did he knock her down a flight of stairs, and the kick her the stomach until she shat blood? Or did he just kind of push her aside, or grab her by the wrist, and shove her around and yell a lot, after she stood in a doorway between him and his bongo drums? Did he overpower her and then hold her down and spit in her face? That might constitute serious psychological abuse, and then again maybe it might not be abuse at all according to some people. Maybe he put her over his knee and spanked her? (some people might enjoy that sort of thing at the time, and then complain loudly about it later) What does "attacked" mean?

deleted 12y ago

[deleted]