Thank you for the links. I have called the hotline a few times in the past couple weeks.. if nothing else it was just because I had to tell someone how close I

Thank you for the links. I have called the hotline a few times in the past couple weeks.. if nothing else it was just because I had to tell someone how close I was and how bad I felt. I can't tell anyone I know. Partly because I can't bear the embarrassment, but also because I don't want them to stop me.