I griefed a bit myself for the effort I put to learn programming, I do enjoy the concepts and theories, it was playground for my mind. But the way I see it, is

I griefed a bit myself for the effort I put to learn programming, I do enjoy the concepts and theories, it was playground for my mind. But the way I see it, is that I got a matching partner, that is also very good at programming. And there is a strange sense of excitement when I watch the LLMs struggle were I used to struggle and excel in many other areas I'm poor at. But I got into coding to build products/software that I can share with others, and this has accelerated, so that is also exciting, I decided to put the money and fear aside and do what I love..build things. "And if you can do it, people think you're clever, and respect you." - that is the main issue here..personally, in where I come from the work was never respected and also never paid well, so I always did it because I like to create/build and keep my mind engaged.