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> I packed up what was left, put all but necessities into storage. Sold my car. (Not directly related to the article, but) : In the West, is it always the husb

by _debug_ 14y ago

> I packed up what was left, put all but necessities into storage. Sold my car. (Not directly related to the article, but) : In the West, is it always the husband that has to leave the house? I once saw a movie in which the husband comes home and discovers that he being offered a divorce, and the wife says, "Leave my home". She was a stay-at-home wife, and he was working. I found it odd that she refers to it "my home" rather than "our home" or "the home" or "I think it is better if we both live apart", which is more civil. If so, it's a cultural dictum, rather than a legal one, right? (I am from India and I don't know many divorced people).

JohnBooty 14y ago
It's not a norm, exactly. If you own the house together, you can't force the other person to leave (unless it's a matter of safety and you involve the police.) As long as things aren't TOO nasty, couples usually figure something out so that nobody goes homeless. If your wife was a stay-at-home wife with no income, and no place to go, you might let her stay in the house.
jacalata 14y ago
He says near the beginning that they were planning to move and the house was already on the market - both of them had to leave the house. It is not always true that the husband has to leave the house. 1. sometimes only one partner could afford the house on their own. It makes sense for them to be the one that stays. 2. if there are children, then where possible it can make life easier on them if the parent who gets custody stays in the house so the children don't have to move. This is more frequently the mother. 3. if the divorce is seen as one person's "fault" then they are expected to take on most of the inconvenience, which includes moving out. 4. depending on your state and any pre-nuptial agreements and niche circumstances like living in a house owned by the parents of one person, sometimes the house straight up belongs to one member of the couple and they get to stay there. /edit formatting wtf?
- _debug_ 14y ago
  Thanks! I guess what applies to the situation in the movie is point 2, about the children.
anothermachine 14y ago
It goes either way, depending on circumstances. For example, if someone has a new lover, the adulterer usually moves out. It's actually rare for someone to evict the other, since it's entirely illegal and usually undesired by the evictee. If the separation is very much ill-willed, the person who wants the divorce usually leaves (often as a surprise).

by _debug_ 14y ago

JohnBooty 14y ago

It's not a norm, exactly. If you own the house together, you can't force the other person to leave (unless it's a matter of safety and you involve the police.) As long as things aren't TOO nasty, couples usually figure something out so that nobody goes homeless. If your wife was a stay-at-home wife with no income, and no place to go, you might let her stay in the house.

jacalata 14y ago

He says near the beginning that they were planning to move and the house was already on the market - both of them had to leave the house. It is not always true that the husband has to leave the house. 1. sometimes only one partner could afford the house on their own. It makes sense for them to be the one that stays. 2. if there are children, then where possible it can make life easier on them if the parent who gets custody stays in the house so the children don't have to move. This is more frequently the mother. 3. if the divorce is seen as one person's "fault" then they are expected to take on most of the inconvenience, which includes moving out. 4. depending on your state and any pre-nuptial agreements and niche circumstances like living in a house owned by the parents of one person, sometimes the house straight up belongs to one member of the couple and they get to stay there. /edit formatting wtf?

_debug_ 14y ago
Thanks! I guess what applies to the situation in the movie is point 2, about the children.

anothermachine 14y ago

It goes either way, depending on circumstances. For example, if someone has a new lover, the adulterer usually moves out. It's actually rare for someone to evict the other, since it's entirely illegal and usually undesired by the evictee. If the separation is very much ill-willed, the person who wants the divorce usually leaves (often as a surprise).