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I feel like articles like these almost always leave out the people who want these questions to be answered: * "Why would I want to network with people?" * "I

by boje 1y ago

I feel like articles like these almost always leave out the people who want these questions to be answered: * "Why would I want to network with people?" * "I don't feel like engaging with anyone." * "I don't enjoy or feel fulfilled doing any of this. I'd rather be home or by myself." * "I have never enjoyed doing this. I have to keep up a facade in front of other people at all times. It makes me angry and resentful." They should expand upon why networking is a thing, why having a social rapport among peers and coworkers is important to healthy relationships both inside and outside of work, how you can have your connection to your social circle weakened if you don't, and spell out clearly why that's a bad thing. Maybe an article like this should look at it from the perspective of mental health and neurodivergence, but that might be pushing it. From the article: "The next morning, I’d wonder if anyone even remembered I was there." Personally speaking, this question has never popped into my mind. I suppose that's owing to the fact that it's simply not in my nature to actively seek out people or connections.

alisonatwork 1y ago
Basically, this. I already spend all the energy I have available for socializing just going to work five days a week. The idea of people socializing outside of work for the sake of work is supremely depressing to me. It's like, so now I need to do something I find utterly exhausting in order to succeed better at this other thing that already completely destroyed me because... capitalism? I can at least understand on an intellectual level that there could be personal benefits to socializing with people outside of work, but when work already sucks everything out of you then it just feels like a cruel joke to suggest an introvert get into "networking" and here's a list of weird, creepy, manipulative tricks to do it better. Surely the article must be a parody?
- shruggedatlas 1y ago
  You sound like you have your own issues to resolve if you are this exhausted by work, which doesn't mean the article is a parody just because you are not its exact intended recipient. There are a handful of tips in there that can help engineer more comfortable situations for people who are less confident networking. That's only if someone is willing to engage with the advice and wishes to better themselves with it, instead of just blaming... capitalism?
  - wiether 1y ago
    It's not the work itself that is exhausting: it's socializing at work. This comments deeply resonates with me because that's exactly how I feel. When I'm wfh I have to put an alarm to remember to stop working because I'm in the flow and can work for +14h without feeling tired. Whereas, when I'm the office, I have to take a walk mid-day because I'm already exhausted by the socializing. And to be clear, it's not that I don't enjoy socializing at work, it's just that it drains me quickly.
    - Quanternion 1y ago
      That's one of the most important reasons I enjoy being able to work from home every once in a while. I'm lucky to have great colleagues and it's fun chatting with them during breaks, but it's still somewhat exhausting at the end of the day. Meanwhile at home there's some online meetings or a few chat messages to exchange, other than that I can just forget about the socializing for a bit and really get into whatever tasks I have.
artyom 1y ago
This tenfold. The premise, the setting, the checklist, the whole thing sounds like torture to me. Life isn't that monochromatic, I'd rather be doing ANYTHING else.
paulcole 1y ago
> I have to keep up a facade in front of other people at all times. This comes down to the idea of whether you believe that if you “keep up a facade at all times” that the facade becomes who you really are. You don’t need an article convincing you why networking is important. You either need to be curious enough to want to see if your life can be better by doing something that goes against what you believe is your nature or not.
npinsker 1y ago
It’s clearly not in the author’s nature, either :) But they seem to be a serial startup founder — so the value of networking’s probably self-evident to them, but won’t match the value you and most others get out of it.

by boje 1y ago

alisonatwork 1y ago

Basically, this. I already spend all the energy I have available for socializing just going to work five days a week. The idea of people socializing outside of work for the sake of work is supremely depressing to me. It's like, so now I need to do something I find utterly exhausting in order to succeed better at this other thing that already completely destroyed me because... capitalism? I can at least understand on an intellectual level that there could be personal benefits to socializing with people outside of work, but when work already sucks everything out of you then it just feels like a cruel joke to suggest an introvert get into "networking" and here's a list of weird, creepy, manipulative tricks to do it better. Surely the article must be a parody?

shruggedatlas 1y ago
You sound like you have your own issues to resolve if you are this exhausted by work, which doesn't mean the article is a parody just because you are not its exact intended recipient. There are a handful of tips in there that can help engineer more comfortable situations for people who are less confident networking. That's only if someone is willing to engage with the advice and wishes to better themselves with it, instead of just blaming... capitalism?
- wiether 1y ago
  It's not the work itself that is exhausting: it's socializing at work. This comments deeply resonates with me because that's exactly how I feel. When I'm wfh I have to put an alarm to remember to stop working because I'm in the flow and can work for +14h without feeling tired. Whereas, when I'm the office, I have to take a walk mid-day because I'm already exhausted by the socializing. And to be clear, it's not that I don't enjoy socializing at work, it's just that it drains me quickly.
  - Quanternion 1y ago
    That's one of the most important reasons I enjoy being able to work from home every once in a while. I'm lucky to have great colleagues and it's fun chatting with them during breaks, but it's still somewhat exhausting at the end of the day. Meanwhile at home there's some online meetings or a few chat messages to exchange, other than that I can just forget about the socializing for a bit and really get into whatever tasks I have.

artyom 1y ago

This tenfold. The premise, the setting, the checklist, the whole thing sounds like torture to me. Life isn't that monochromatic, I'd rather be doing ANYTHING else.

paulcole 1y ago

> I have to keep up a facade in front of other people at all times. This comes down to the idea of whether you believe that if you “keep up a facade at all times” that the facade becomes who you really are. You don’t need an article convincing you why networking is important. You either need to be curious enough to want to see if your life can be better by doing something that goes against what you believe is your nature or not.

npinsker 1y ago

It’s clearly not in the author’s nature, either :) But they seem to be a serial startup founder — so the value of networking’s probably self-evident to them, but won’t match the value you and most others get out of it.