I don't think that's irreconcilable with the author's point. Indeed, I find myself the "adult in the room" amount many of my friends and, frankly, most of my fa

I don't think that's irreconcilable with the author's point. Indeed, I find myself the "adult in the room" amount many of my friends and, frankly, most of my family. If something happens to me, it's usually my job to manage emotions. Likewise, if two people start a heated argument, or if one person wants to do the same with me, it's usually my job to de-escalate. These aren't what I _want_, or what I _need_, for sure - especially if I am the more challenged of the two parties. That's the author's point. (You're sick? Why did you get sick?! You knew you needed to take precautions...!) But frankly the outcome is better for both of us if I choose to manage the situation on both our behalf - both of us "suffer" less.