6 ms·

A mnemonic to help get the convo going or if you hit a rut: FORD: Family, Occupation, Recreation, Dreams. Also "mirroring", which is a tool in negotiation, can

• vlod 4y ago
  >FORD: Family, Occupation, Recreation, Dreams. Meh. When I hear "What do you do?", followed by "What do you do for fun?" I get irritated. If both of you are at a conference/meetup, I find this a bit lazy and really makes me not want to talk to you (because you must be pretty boring if this all you can come up with). I play this game (in my head), for how long the other person ask me. I NEVER ask these questions, which means I'm striving to make the conversation interesting/relevant. If you've run out of things to say, because the other person doesn't give you anything, just move on. They are just not into you or don't want to talk.
  • totalhack 4y ago
    It's a simple tool. Like any tool, you need to know when and how to use it. A conference would not be a great example, as there is generally plenty of other context to discuss there. And yes, knowing when/how to exit a conversation is another important skill in itself. But "run out of things to say" is not always accurate. It's sometimes "locked up on what to say next" or "a struggle to get over the hump to both parties opening up". Sometimes there are still interesting conversations to be had if you can get past that. If you write off everyone just because they aren't great conversationalists or are introverts, you will skip over a lot of interesting people.