7 ms·

Who said anything about your current company?

giantg2 4y ago
I don't have the skills to switch to a different company, tech jobs are limited in my area, I don't perform well remotely, and my wife won't consider relocating. My current shitty job is the best job I can get.
- bumby 4y ago
  It's okay to say tech jobs aren't the right fit as well.
  - giantg2 4y ago
    They might not be. I'm hesitant to admit that because 1) They used to be and I was a high performer at a mediocre non-tech company 2) There's nothing else I can do to earn enough to support my family.
    - bumby 4y ago
      >There's nothing else I can do to earn enough to support my family. Honest question that I know won't be well-received on HN: I don't know your personal details, but do you think there is not anyone else in a lower paid job who has figured out a way to support their family? Frustration stems from when reality doesn't meet our expectations. You can choose to try and bend reality to your will or change your expectations. One is significantly easier than the other.
      - giantg2 4y ago
        Sure, I can take a lower paying job. We would likely have to sell our house and move to an apartment and give up hope of retirement. The thing is, many of these people in lower paying job still make decent money, but those are skilled jobs. I would have to go to a trade school or apprentice for many of those, but likely couldn't due to needing an income. Because I would be unskilled labor, I would probably be looking at jobs around $20/hr with benefits (if I'm lucky). Without benefits, we'll be bankrupt quickly. Most of my frustration is because my bosses are assholes. I now expect bosses to be assholes, but it's still frustrating.
- frostwarrior 4y ago
  > I don't have the skills to switch to a different company Go and learn. Skills are not set in stone. > I don't perform well remotely, and my wife won't consider relocating I understand that. I don't know you, but maybe a nicer setup with more (not too direct) sunlight can make it better?
  - giantg2 4y ago
    "Go and learn. Skills are not set in stone." Sure, but learning takes time, which I have little of. It's also much easier for some than others (getting significantly more difficult as I age). The main remote issue is that my wife interrupts me to do stuff or answer questions throughout the day. I also feel I'm slower to learn remotely. I think that if I'm an expert in the tech already, then remote could work.
    - frostwarrior 4y ago
      I get it, but you already have a job. I assume you are be pretty busy, but at least you already have a secure source of money and you're not against the clock or anything like that. You don't need to spend all day in a class like a university student. An hour a day dedicated to lectures, practice and taking some notes with pencil and paper* can do wonders on the long term. As for your wife, maybe you can talk to her and ask her to leave you alone for some specific times, unless it's urgent. Or ask her to send you a message instead of talking so it doesn't interrupt your focus so much. * Some research on learning has proven that taking notes like that is way more effective than typing on a keyboard.
      - giantg2 4y ago
        Thanks. I have tried talking to her, but the results weren't great. I do try to learn things outside of work. The main problem is if you don't use it, you lose it. Without constant practice it's hard to build and retain skills. I don't even have an hour a day free for that due to work and home responsibilities.
        4y ago
- TameAntelope 4y ago
  Get the skills, limited doesn’t mean none, get better at performing remotely, drop the wife… You are in complete control over your life, but you have to accept that responsibility. Stop blaming externalities and start owning your choices.
  - giantg2 4y ago
    Everything is a tradeoff. Just because someone view the weight of the choices differently doesn't mean they are wrong. Check your ego.
    - TameAntelope 4y ago
      Did I say you were wrong? No, you did. No ego, just facts, and your attitude here is crap, your headspace is so negative I’m not at all surprised you’re suffering such as you are.
      - giantg2 4y ago
        Based on your comment history, you seem to be very aggressive and derogatory. I would almost say you're trolling. It's quite pedantic to claim you never said someone is wrong even after you've said several things which effectively say that.
        TameAntelope 4y ago
        I'm not the person who is causing your anger and frustration, but the fact that you choose to berate me instead of do anything about your situation speaks volumes.

I don't have the skills to switch to a different company, tech jobs are limited in my area, I don't perform well remotely, and my wife won't consider relocating. My current shitty job is the best job I can get.

bumby 4y ago
It's okay to say tech jobs aren't the right fit as well.
- giantg2 4y ago
  They might not be. I'm hesitant to admit that because 1) They used to be and I was a high performer at a mediocre non-tech company 2) There's nothing else I can do to earn enough to support my family.
  - bumby 4y ago
    >There's nothing else I can do to earn enough to support my family. Honest question that I know won't be well-received on HN: I don't know your personal details, but do you think there is not anyone else in a lower paid job who has figured out a way to support their family? Frustration stems from when reality doesn't meet our expectations. You can choose to try and bend reality to your will or change your expectations. One is significantly easier than the other.
    - giantg2 4y ago
      Sure, I can take a lower paying job. We would likely have to sell our house and move to an apartment and give up hope of retirement. The thing is, many of these people in lower paying job still make decent money, but those are skilled jobs. I would have to go to a trade school or apprentice for many of those, but likely couldn't due to needing an income. Because I would be unskilled labor, I would probably be looking at jobs around $20/hr with benefits (if I'm lucky). Without benefits, we'll be bankrupt quickly. Most of my frustration is because my bosses are assholes. I now expect bosses to be assholes, but it's still frustrating.
frostwarrior 4y ago
> I don't have the skills to switch to a different company Go and learn. Skills are not set in stone. > I don't perform well remotely, and my wife won't consider relocating I understand that. I don't know you, but maybe a nicer setup with more (not too direct) sunlight can make it better?
- giantg2 4y ago
  "Go and learn. Skills are not set in stone." Sure, but learning takes time, which I have little of. It's also much easier for some than others (getting significantly more difficult as I age). The main remote issue is that my wife interrupts me to do stuff or answer questions throughout the day. I also feel I'm slower to learn remotely. I think that if I'm an expert in the tech already, then remote could work.
  - frostwarrior 4y ago
    I get it, but you already have a job. I assume you are be pretty busy, but at least you already have a secure source of money and you're not against the clock or anything like that. You don't need to spend all day in a class like a university student. An hour a day dedicated to lectures, practice and taking some notes with pencil and paper* can do wonders on the long term. As for your wife, maybe you can talk to her and ask her to leave you alone for some specific times, unless it's urgent. Or ask her to send you a message instead of talking so it doesn't interrupt your focus so much. * Some research on learning has proven that taking notes like that is way more effective than typing on a keyboard.
    - giantg2 4y ago
      Thanks. I have tried talking to her, but the results weren't great. I do try to learn things outside of work. The main problem is if you don't use it, you lose it. Without constant practice it's hard to build and retain skills. I don't even have an hour a day free for that due to work and home responsibilities.
      - 4y ago
TameAntelope 4y ago
Get the skills, limited doesn’t mean none, get better at performing remotely, drop the wife… You are in complete control over your life, but you have to accept that responsibility. Stop blaming externalities and start owning your choices.
- giantg2 4y ago
  Everything is a tradeoff. Just because someone view the weight of the choices differently doesn't mean they are wrong. Check your ego.
  - TameAntelope 4y ago
    Did I say you were wrong? No, you did. No ego, just facts, and your attitude here is crap, your headspace is so negative I’m not at all surprised you’re suffering such as you are.
    - giantg2 4y ago
      Based on your comment history, you seem to be very aggressive and derogatory. I would almost say you're trolling. It's quite pedantic to claim you never said someone is wrong even after you've said several things which effectively say that.
      - TameAntelope 4y ago
        I'm not the person who is causing your anger and frustration, but the fact that you choose to berate me instead of do anything about your situation speaks volumes.