6 ms·

> if you're in north America, take heart that its not your fault! The American dating market is absolute garbage. What do you mean?

cultofmetatron 5y ago
People can't handle truth and I'd rather not be downvoted to oblivion. Suffice to say, the american dating market is heavily geared towards attractive white men over 6 ft tall. They better also be a millionaire if you're in the bay area. I'd suggest traveling like I have to southeast Asia, Europe and latin America for extended periods of time and see for yourself.
- Mezzie 5y ago
  > Suffice to say, the american dating market is heavily geared towards attractive white men over 6 ft tall. They better also be a millionaire if you're in the bay area. The lesbian dating market is a bit different. ;)
  - cultofmetatron 5y ago
    haha thats probably very true. I'd say don't give up!. travel as well, it'll enrich your life and make your more interesting to that special someone when you finally meet her. I wouldn't be surprised if you meet her in your travels.
- Invictus0 5y ago
  What you're actually saying is that you are unable to compete in the American dating market, and so you're moving to other less competitive dating markets where you might be more highly valued. Obviously since this is HN we can't consider the female perspective, but if we consider the female perspective, the American dating market is probably pretty good because it offers a great number of attractive white men over 6 ft tall.
  - renox 5y ago
    It's not specific to the USA, in France the situation is the same, most of the young women want the 'alpha male' so if you're not one, you have to wait until you're older.. It made being young much less pleasant than it ought to be, plus it means that we were a bit old when we had children..
    - kenneth 5y ago
      And now we know why Hong Kong is basically full of French men.
  - cultofmetatron 5y ago
    I completely agree, if you're a straight woman (especially white), I'd def recommend staying in the united states. My advice is specifically for men because thats my lived experience.
- pratik661 5y ago
  That’s interesting. I wonder how much that applies to South Asians though. I think most of the dating advice in these threads is tailored towards white people who have different experiences from other POC.
  - cultofmetatron 5y ago
    I am south asian (srilankan american) so my advice is comming from the perspective of a person of color. The best places for dating for a south asian male would be southeast asia, turkey and latin america. White guys definitely have an advantage when going after women that specifically want a foreigner. We're able to get the ones that would otherwise prefer to date within their own country. I had some success in europe but it was hit or miss. I'd say it was a pretty neutral experience, I felt like the deck wasn't stacked for or against me on average. latin america on the other hand was where I had my best prospects. In my experience, latinas in colombia love the way we look. If I asked 10 women on a date, I'd easily get at least 8 to say yes and show up while white foreigners I met in medellin would frequently complain that colombians were flakey and prone to cancel at the last minuite. The exact kind of behavior I'd get from white women in america. These days I have one that I absolutely adore so I'm off the dating market but every day I'm shocked that I have her because living in america drove into my head that someone as smart and beautiful as her was completely out of my league..
    - pratik661 5y ago
      That’s really interesting to know. Happy to see another desi doing really well.

cultofmetatron 5y ago

People can't handle truth and I'd rather not be downvoted to oblivion. Suffice to say, the american dating market is heavily geared towards attractive white men over 6 ft tall. They better also be a millionaire if you're in the bay area. I'd suggest traveling like I have to southeast Asia, Europe and latin America for extended periods of time and see for yourself.

Mezzie 5y ago
> Suffice to say, the american dating market is heavily geared towards attractive white men over 6 ft tall. They better also be a millionaire if you're in the bay area. The lesbian dating market is a bit different. ;)
- cultofmetatron 5y ago
  haha thats probably very true. I'd say don't give up!. travel as well, it'll enrich your life and make your more interesting to that special someone when you finally meet her. I wouldn't be surprised if you meet her in your travels.
Invictus0 5y ago
What you're actually saying is that you are unable to compete in the American dating market, and so you're moving to other less competitive dating markets where you might be more highly valued. Obviously since this is HN we can't consider the female perspective, but if we consider the female perspective, the American dating market is probably pretty good because it offers a great number of attractive white men over 6 ft tall.
- renox 5y ago
  It's not specific to the USA, in France the situation is the same, most of the young women want the 'alpha male' so if you're not one, you have to wait until you're older.. It made being young much less pleasant than it ought to be, plus it means that we were a bit old when we had children..
  - kenneth 5y ago
    And now we know why Hong Kong is basically full of French men.
- cultofmetatron 5y ago
  I completely agree, if you're a straight woman (especially white), I'd def recommend staying in the united states. My advice is specifically for men because thats my lived experience.
pratik661 5y ago
That’s interesting. I wonder how much that applies to South Asians though. I think most of the dating advice in these threads is tailored towards white people who have different experiences from other POC.
- cultofmetatron 5y ago
  I am south asian (srilankan american) so my advice is comming from the perspective of a person of color. The best places for dating for a south asian male would be southeast asia, turkey and latin america. White guys definitely have an advantage when going after women that specifically want a foreigner. We're able to get the ones that would otherwise prefer to date within their own country. I had some success in europe but it was hit or miss. I'd say it was a pretty neutral experience, I felt like the deck wasn't stacked for or against me on average. latin america on the other hand was where I had my best prospects. In my experience, latinas in colombia love the way we look. If I asked 10 women on a date, I'd easily get at least 8 to say yes and show up while white foreigners I met in medellin would frequently complain that colombians were flakey and prone to cancel at the last minuite. The exact kind of behavior I'd get from white women in america. These days I have one that I absolutely adore so I'm off the dating market but every day I'm shocked that I have her because living in america drove into my head that someone as smart and beautiful as her was completely out of my league..
  - pratik661 5y ago
    That’s really interesting to know. Happy to see another desi doing really well.