I think you misread op (either that or I did). I didn't interpret the post as "I was feeling barely containable violence then" but more of a "I became aware of

I think you misread op (either that or I did). I didn't interpret the post as "I was feeling barely containable violence then" but more of a "I became aware of the barely contained violence that me/humans have under the surface". As in, a change of judgement on his current and past condition, rather than a new emotion.