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I'm hesitant to declare this about myself because of all the biases that can be at play and what not but I generally feel I may be similar. Sure once I make a

I'm hesitant to declare this about myself because of all the biases that can be at play and what not but I generally feel I may be similar. Sure once I make a post I'll check back for responses/likes but it's never on my mind when I create the post. More importantly I never find myself wanting to post anything. In fact its borderline difficult. I hate having to put my thoughts down and try to be conscious of how other's might perceive this. This is becoming increasingly frustrating as I type this right now. I generally feel like I have nothing significant enough to say to put myself through the effort to write it down. I much prefer verbal. Maybe it's not so much a resistance to social media addiction as much as it is despising the process of writing.

exikyut 5y ago
FWIW I incidentally feel very similarly. I can write reasonably effectively (if longwindedly), but if I'm particularly invested in a subject I curiously just don't want to figure out where to start because the whole process feels utterly overwhelming. A few things come to mind that might be related. Firstly, (I think that) parts of my thinking/reasoning process route through and leverage the language center of my brain like a crutch, or a like sequence of stepping stones, that my brain somehow uses in order to stay focused and retain my train of thought. I've found that the whole talk-to-the-air/sounding out thing public speakers do has helped me to better elucidate ideas. In that context, I'll talk about something as though it already exists. Independently of all that, I also find I reason about a few ideas or topics using a sort of indeterminate/open-ended/unconditional focus model that seems to have a bunch of cues associated with it that allow me to carefully isolate the focus process from the traditional "oh meep, solve problem... yay, done!" beginning/middle/end reward cycle, such that I just find myself pondering the ideas on occasion, then naturally drift away when they become boring without associating them with the friction of mental exhaustion in the same way that I tend to do with almost everything (including the discussion topics in the previous paragraph). Critically, I don't tend to reason about the second group of things using language, instead using nameless compound associations I typically perceive as instantaneous point recollections of That One Time I Thought Of A Thing. So it seems I have writing and "funnel entire thought process through language center" on one side, and complex problem solving, ideation, long-term focus retention aaaand unfortunately _memory_ on the other side, of a rift I've been puzzling over for years. (Naturally, if I try to reason about any of those instantaneous recollections, they fragment like waking up from a dream. I've learned to leave them alone, and just try to stumble into them a lot. Not a very effective method.) This whole issue makes writing about those particularly/exceptionlly-interesting ideas next to impossible: because this rift creates the equivalent of a block against sensible random access to all of those memories, I can only write one-dimensionally about a single element of a given idea that I know I have a much deeper understanding of... and the result is that it feels pointless. Hm. I just realized this is way more specific than I thought it would be before I wrote it out. (Caveat emptor.) I'm now very curious if this is even remotely tangentially relevant to what you describe.
- btkramer9 5y ago
  While a bit of a tangent I think this is a wonderful exploration on reasoning how complex writing things down can be. Remembering a dream is a very apt comparison, it all fragments and falls apart the more you try to put it together. I believe this is why writing can be so powerful though. It forces you to connect and clarify everything. With all of this said it's incredible that people are able to post on social media often. It's a crushing amount of mental energy. You could chalk it up to others not being critical thinkers but that just feels like a subconscious way to insult them and simultaneously compliment yourself. I had to tell my girlfriend when we first started dating that I usually see her texts within moments of getting them. However if I don't respond soon then I'm not trying to play mental games, build tension or whatever. I need time to formulate a response and type it out. When she sees me text others she is appalled at how difficult it is for me. I can coordinate plans, answer a short question or relay facts with no effort. The second it becomes a conversation or small talk I just lock up. This is with everybody not just someone I'm attracted to.
throwaway2037 5y ago
btkramer - Please post more here on HN! Exactly this sentiment and restraint is what makes HN so magical. Truly: Less is more on HN. I intentionally post under a semi-anonymous login ID because my job is very sensitive to public exposure. "[B]orderline difficult" -- I felt exactly the same before I started posting about serious, but difficult issues here. (One of my first posts was about a serial killer [!] in California who was caught by DNA analysis. That would be impossible for me to comment about under my real name.) Posting under a semi-anonymous login ID gave the intellectual freedom that I needed. Kindly, please try posting a few comments under a semi-anonymous login ID. If you get a few up-votes, you may be motivated to post more.
- btkramer9 5y ago
  Thank you I really appreciate your encouragement. I understand why you may want to be anonymous and especially for the example you gave. I don't think that's my blocker however I can certainly give it a try. Organizing my thoughts and second guessing everything feels like the main blocker. If you look at my response to a sibling comment, it's worth pointing out that it took over two hours to write (while in work meetings with only a few times I needed to chime in). For some reason a response like this only took about 10 minutes. Perhaps because this is more of a thank you with a fact/comment. The other is much more of an idea/concept.

exikyut 5y ago

FWIW I incidentally feel very similarly. I can write reasonably effectively (if longwindedly), but if I'm particularly invested in a subject I curiously just don't want to figure out where to start because the whole process feels utterly overwhelming. A few things come to mind that might be related. Firstly, (I think that) parts of my thinking/reasoning process route through and leverage the language center of my brain like a crutch, or a like sequence of stepping stones, that my brain somehow uses in order to stay focused and retain my train of thought. I've found that the whole talk-to-the-air/sounding out thing public speakers do has helped me to better elucidate ideas. In that context, I'll talk about something as though it already exists. Independently of all that, I also find I reason about a few ideas or topics using a sort of indeterminate/open-ended/unconditional focus model that seems to have a bunch of cues associated with it that allow me to carefully isolate the focus process from the traditional "oh meep, solve problem... yay, done!" beginning/middle/end reward cycle, such that I just find myself pondering the ideas on occasion, then naturally drift away when they become boring without associating them with the friction of mental exhaustion in the same way that I tend to do with almost everything (including the discussion topics in the previous paragraph). Critically, I don't tend to reason about the second group of things using language, instead using nameless compound associations I typically perceive as instantaneous point recollections of That One Time I Thought Of A Thing. So it seems I have writing and "funnel entire thought process through language center" on one side, and complex problem solving, ideation, long-term focus retention aaaand unfortunately _memory_ on the other side, of a rift I've been puzzling over for years. (Naturally, if I try to reason about any of those instantaneous recollections, they fragment like waking up from a dream. I've learned to leave them alone, and just try to stumble into them a lot. Not a very effective method.) This whole issue makes writing about those particularly/exceptionlly-interesting ideas next to impossible: because this rift creates the equivalent of a block against sensible random access to all of those memories, I can only write one-dimensionally about a single element of a given idea that I know I have a much deeper understanding of... and the result is that it feels pointless. Hm. I just realized this is way more specific than I thought it would be before I wrote it out. (Caveat emptor.) I'm now very curious if this is even remotely tangentially relevant to what you describe.

btkramer9 5y ago
While a bit of a tangent I think this is a wonderful exploration on reasoning how complex writing things down can be. Remembering a dream is a very apt comparison, it all fragments and falls apart the more you try to put it together. I believe this is why writing can be so powerful though. It forces you to connect and clarify everything. With all of this said it's incredible that people are able to post on social media often. It's a crushing amount of mental energy. You could chalk it up to others not being critical thinkers but that just feels like a subconscious way to insult them and simultaneously compliment yourself. I had to tell my girlfriend when we first started dating that I usually see her texts within moments of getting them. However if I don't respond soon then I'm not trying to play mental games, build tension or whatever. I need time to formulate a response and type it out. When she sees me text others she is appalled at how difficult it is for me. I can coordinate plans, answer a short question or relay facts with no effort. The second it becomes a conversation or small talk I just lock up. This is with everybody not just someone I'm attracted to.

throwaway2037 5y ago

btkramer - Please post more here on HN! Exactly this sentiment and restraint is what makes HN so magical. Truly: Less is more on HN. I intentionally post under a semi-anonymous login ID because my job is very sensitive to public exposure. "[B]orderline difficult" -- I felt exactly the same before I started posting about serious, but difficult issues here. (One of my first posts was about a serial killer [!] in California who was caught by DNA analysis. That would be impossible for me to comment about under my real name.) Posting under a semi-anonymous login ID gave the intellectual freedom that I needed. Kindly, please try posting a few comments under a semi-anonymous login ID. If you get a few up-votes, you may be motivated to post more.

btkramer9 5y ago
Thank you I really appreciate your encouragement. I understand why you may want to be anonymous and especially for the example you gave. I don't think that's my blocker however I can certainly give it a try. Organizing my thoughts and second guessing everything feels like the main blocker. If you look at my response to a sibling comment, it's worth pointing out that it took over two hours to write (while in work meetings with only a few times I needed to chime in). For some reason a response like this only took about 10 minutes. Perhaps because this is more of a thank you with a fact/comment. The other is much more of an idea/concept.