7 ms·

How exactly can it become unhealthy? I'm not saying you're wrong. I just don't see it myself. If anything, it just looks like Stoicism to me.

Retric 5y ago
People need to accept that getting better at something comes at the cost of not being better at something else. Some things like being able to clearly communicate in writing or even just walking are inherently useful. However, if the benchmark is being able to walk that’s pass fail, what does it matter if your in the 15th percentile or 90th percentile walker? Similarly not everything makes the cut. Judging a RPG wizard by their strength score misses the point. When someone accepts that splitting their focus isn’t free. Then not learning French and not being on the top 10% of something was also useful. Judging yourself by external rankings in multiple categories is therefore foolish. Having a higher rank in something may be counter productive.
- OnlyOneCannolo 5y ago
  I didn't (and still don't) interpret the comment as saying that their kids have to be the best at everything. I think you're preaching to the choir.
  - Retric 5y ago
    The point I am trying to make making isn’t about trying to be the best at everything, the point I making is the top 1% isn’t inherently better than the 50th percentile. People who judge themselves by external metrics and think higher must be better can become overachievers, but getting depressed about their “failings” is just as problematic. I don’t mean this as a happy go lucky, showing up is worth a prize. I mean it in terms of the evolutionary pressure, body builders make poor marathon athletes.
    - OnlyOneCannolo 5y ago
      Well, I don't see how it says that moving up the rankings is inherently better either.
      - Retric 5y ago
        “Odds are, you ARE behind.“ The rank for strongest person goes in one direction, the rank for weakest person goes the other. To say your behind suggests a preferred and ranked ordering, that’s reasonably true of checkout lines at the grocery store. However it’s not so for total body weight as neither 50lbs nor 500lbs is the ideal adult body weight.
        OnlyOneCannolo 5y ago
        You can be objectively behind without it being subjectively worse. I don't think it suggests what you're saying. It literally says not to compete with others. If you still see everything as a competition, you're not taking the advice. And if you're competing on an absurd metric that nobody else even thinks is a competition, like being the heaviest, then you probably have other issues that you need to work on.

Retric 5y ago

People need to accept that getting better at something comes at the cost of not being better at something else. Some things like being able to clearly communicate in writing or even just walking are inherently useful. However, if the benchmark is being able to walk that’s pass fail, what does it matter if your in the 15th percentile or 90th percentile walker? Similarly not everything makes the cut. Judging a RPG wizard by their strength score misses the point. When someone accepts that splitting their focus isn’t free. Then not learning French and not being on the top 10% of something was also useful. Judging yourself by external rankings in multiple categories is therefore foolish. Having a higher rank in something may be counter productive.

OnlyOneCannolo 5y ago
I didn't (and still don't) interpret the comment as saying that their kids have to be the best at everything. I think you're preaching to the choir.
- Retric 5y ago
  The point I am trying to make making isn’t about trying to be the best at everything, the point I making is the top 1% isn’t inherently better than the 50th percentile. People who judge themselves by external metrics and think higher must be better can become overachievers, but getting depressed about their “failings” is just as problematic. I don’t mean this as a happy go lucky, showing up is worth a prize. I mean it in terms of the evolutionary pressure, body builders make poor marathon athletes.
  - OnlyOneCannolo 5y ago
    Well, I don't see how it says that moving up the rankings is inherently better either.
    - Retric 5y ago
      “Odds are, you ARE behind.“ The rank for strongest person goes in one direction, the rank for weakest person goes the other. To say your behind suggests a preferred and ranked ordering, that’s reasonably true of checkout lines at the grocery store. However it’s not so for total body weight as neither 50lbs nor 500lbs is the ideal adult body weight.
      - OnlyOneCannolo 5y ago
        You can be objectively behind without it being subjectively worse. I don't think it suggests what you're saying. It literally says not to compete with others. If you still see everything as a competition, you're not taking the advice. And if you're competing on an absurd metric that nobody else even thinks is a competition, like being the heaviest, then you probably have other issues that you need to work on.