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When I was younger, I thought homeschooling was almost exclusively because parents were weird and controlling - maybe even in a cult like situation. Or I though

When I was younger, I thought homeschooling was almost exclusively because parents were weird and controlling - maybe even in a cult like situation. Or I thought homeschooling was for socially hopeless kids that couldn’t cut it in “real” school. I have no idea why my perception was so negative. Now that I’m older, my opinion has completely flipped. I am grateful to have had access to public education, but it was probably bronze standard at best. If I had children, I’d probably homeschool them.

rdtwo 6y ago
A lot of school problems don’t do away in the real world. Cheating, bullying, boredom are regular parts of daily life for many workers. There are life skills that are learned in school that aren’t just textbook educational items
- musingsole 6y ago
  Those life skills get taught in homeschool programs too. Or are you under the impression homeschool students are locked away in a closet with a textbook and no windows until they turn 18? The only lesson a state school can teach that might be missing in a homeschool program is that large institutions are out of your control, have their own motivations, and will maim you without a second's hesitation.
- rpiguyshy 6y ago
  this is nonsense. almost nothing is carried over. it seems like you have never been the target of viscous bullying. there is no comparison whatsoever to bullying in school and in the workplace. the differences are innumerable. the most important difference is that childhood bullying damages the developing brain and creates lasting emotional damage. you are simply more vulnerable at those ages. you will be much, much better equipped to deal with bullying later in life if you are not carrying the emotional scars of being systematically targeted when you were a child. some adversity is necessary but this is a different discussion. im so sick of people offering this idiotic perspective because they never experienced being the target for more than a year. your opinion hurts people.
  - throwawaysthrow 6y ago
    Throwaway for obvious reasons. I think you're the one whose talking nonsense. Isolating children from the outside world to "protect them" (or for any reason for that matter) should not be celebrated. I've been the target of relentless, viscous bullying in school, and it was at a time where kids openly bullied in front of teachers (and camp counselors) and it was just considered normal. Nobody ever tried to stop it because at the time that was not considered something to really correct, just part of normal childhood. The main reasons I was bullied was because I was a runt (physically) and I was not taught any social skills by my parents. HOWEVER, my parents were severely abusive and were much worse bullies than anyone in school. If I were taken out of school because of "bullying" I would just be much, much worse off and I can't see how I'd ever be able to recover from that without exposure to the outside world. How else would I ever learn better, learn social skills, or learn to make friends (eventually)? >there is no comparison whatsoever to bullying in school and in the workplace In an office full of college graduates, probably not, but I've experienced very similar bullying at a dysfunctional blue collar job Beyond that bullying growing up was just as bad at non-school organizations - summer camp, after school programs, and dance/gymnastics classes so I don't see how homeschooling (if my parents weren't abusive) is going to stop bullying without also isolating children from the outside world completely, which would be severely damaging. So you're basically advocating not letting children to socialize in any capacity because their feelings might get hurt by other kids. This is cruel. My point is, homeschooling doesn't prevent bullying unless completely isolate your children. I'm not accusing all (or even most) homeschoolers of isolating their children, however, all the ones I personally know did isolate their children. People are actually trying to stop bullying in school nowadays, so my experience would be different nowadays. >childhood bullying damages the developing brain and creates lasting emotional damage Oh, please, the severe emotional damage caused by isolating children from the outside world is so much worse. Also the severe emotional damage that parents can inflict on their children are so much worse than anything a peer at school can inflict, like 1000% worse. I was barely phased by the relentless bullying at school because home was just so much worse. (Plus my parents had already taught me that I was worthless, so it wasn't exactly surprising) I've known a few people (different families) who grew up entirely isolated from the outside world to "protect" them from any person, place, or (especially) idea that wasn't pre-approved by their parents. They are all extremely dysfunctional. My husband was a boss to one of these guys and he literally couldn't function in the workplace and would have emotional breakdowns regularly. He's dead now, he killed himself. The rest I know are perpetual children who literally have no ability to function without a caretaker (usually their parents, one her arranged marriage husband). I have no idea what's going to happen to these people if they outlive their caretaker, I don't want to think about it, it's incredibly sad. >im so sick of people offering this idiotic perspective because they never experienced being the target for more than a year. your opinion hurts people. If you want to turn childhood trauma into a competition, I will "win."
mgkimsal 6y ago
I don't know if you were necessarily 'wrong' for having those perceptions. Homeschooling has become far more of a 'thing' in the past 20+ years, and I think it's been fueled by access to technology and growing concerns over school quality. Even info about 'school quality' is more accessible/shared/debated because of technology (forums/facebook/etc). That said, the only handful of homeschooling families I knew 40 years ago were - to my recollection - exclusively religious in their motivations. Not everyone homeschooling family I know in the last few years is due to religious conviction, although that's still there in many cases.

rdtwo 6y ago

A lot of school problems don’t do away in the real world. Cheating, bullying, boredom are regular parts of daily life for many workers. There are life skills that are learned in school that aren’t just textbook educational items

musingsole 6y ago
Those life skills get taught in homeschool programs too. Or are you under the impression homeschool students are locked away in a closet with a textbook and no windows until they turn 18? The only lesson a state school can teach that might be missing in a homeschool program is that large institutions are out of your control, have their own motivations, and will maim you without a second's hesitation.
rpiguyshy 6y ago
this is nonsense. almost nothing is carried over. it seems like you have never been the target of viscous bullying. there is no comparison whatsoever to bullying in school and in the workplace. the differences are innumerable. the most important difference is that childhood bullying damages the developing brain and creates lasting emotional damage. you are simply more vulnerable at those ages. you will be much, much better equipped to deal with bullying later in life if you are not carrying the emotional scars of being systematically targeted when you were a child. some adversity is necessary but this is a different discussion. im so sick of people offering this idiotic perspective because they never experienced being the target for more than a year. your opinion hurts people.
- throwawaysthrow 6y ago
  Throwaway for obvious reasons. I think you're the one whose talking nonsense. Isolating children from the outside world to "protect them" (or for any reason for that matter) should not be celebrated. I've been the target of relentless, viscous bullying in school, and it was at a time where kids openly bullied in front of teachers (and camp counselors) and it was just considered normal. Nobody ever tried to stop it because at the time that was not considered something to really correct, just part of normal childhood. The main reasons I was bullied was because I was a runt (physically) and I was not taught any social skills by my parents. HOWEVER, my parents were severely abusive and were much worse bullies than anyone in school. If I were taken out of school because of "bullying" I would just be much, much worse off and I can't see how I'd ever be able to recover from that without exposure to the outside world. How else would I ever learn better, learn social skills, or learn to make friends (eventually)? >there is no comparison whatsoever to bullying in school and in the workplace In an office full of college graduates, probably not, but I've experienced very similar bullying at a dysfunctional blue collar job Beyond that bullying growing up was just as bad at non-school organizations - summer camp, after school programs, and dance/gymnastics classes so I don't see how homeschooling (if my parents weren't abusive) is going to stop bullying without also isolating children from the outside world completely, which would be severely damaging. So you're basically advocating not letting children to socialize in any capacity because their feelings might get hurt by other kids. This is cruel. My point is, homeschooling doesn't prevent bullying unless completely isolate your children. I'm not accusing all (or even most) homeschoolers of isolating their children, however, all the ones I personally know did isolate their children. People are actually trying to stop bullying in school nowadays, so my experience would be different nowadays. >childhood bullying damages the developing brain and creates lasting emotional damage Oh, please, the severe emotional damage caused by isolating children from the outside world is so much worse. Also the severe emotional damage that parents can inflict on their children are so much worse than anything a peer at school can inflict, like 1000% worse. I was barely phased by the relentless bullying at school because home was just so much worse. (Plus my parents had already taught me that I was worthless, so it wasn't exactly surprising) I've known a few people (different families) who grew up entirely isolated from the outside world to "protect" them from any person, place, or (especially) idea that wasn't pre-approved by their parents. They are all extremely dysfunctional. My husband was a boss to one of these guys and he literally couldn't function in the workplace and would have emotional breakdowns regularly. He's dead now, he killed himself. The rest I know are perpetual children who literally have no ability to function without a caretaker (usually their parents, one her arranged marriage husband). I have no idea what's going to happen to these people if they outlive their caretaker, I don't want to think about it, it's incredibly sad. >im so sick of people offering this idiotic perspective because they never experienced being the target for more than a year. your opinion hurts people. If you want to turn childhood trauma into a competition, I will "win."

mgkimsal 6y ago

I don't know if you were necessarily 'wrong' for having those perceptions. Homeschooling has become far more of a 'thing' in the past 20+ years, and I think it's been fueled by access to technology and growing concerns over school quality. Even info about 'school quality' is more accessible/shared/debated because of technology (forums/facebook/etc). That said, the only handful of homeschooling families I knew 40 years ago were - to my recollection - exclusively religious in their motivations. Not everyone homeschooling family I know in the last few years is due to religious conviction, although that's still there in many cases.