6 ms·

A couple things from this forty-year old: 1. If you want to have kids, do it sooner rather than later. The sooner you have them, the better: they grow up so f

by torpor 16y ago

A couple things from this forty-year old: 1. If you want to have kids, do it sooner rather than later. The sooner you have them, the better: they grow up so fast, you'll still have time in your 40's to enjoy life with them as teenagers, if you're lucky. If you leave it too late, you'll be pretty disconnected from their teen lives, and hell .. what 40-year old doesn't enjoy the odd jaunt with their teenage kids, eh? I know I wish I'd had my kids a decade sooner .. and don't let anyone tell you its hard, either. Its not hard, if you love them enough, to keep your lives together and do well as a family. Family units are the strongest groups you will ever find or belong to, if they are indeed a unit .. 2. The wisdom of the Mob. It doesn't exist in nearly as palatable a form as most people might desire, and there is also the ugly truth that the Mob can be downright stupid. Collective truth is often full of lies. You would be wise to exercise your ability to disassociate yourself from collective thought as often, and as early, as possible. This means, always question "what everyone else knows to be true" four, five, six times, before you use it as a basis for life decisions .. The Mob wishes to Eat you, Individual, and Never Forget That! 3. Save. Save, save, save. 10% of your money saved on a regular basis now is a huge relief in the future. I wish I'd enforced this on myself a bit better in the 20's .. you simply cannot avoid the fact that if you save during your most productive years, your least productive years will be better off for it ..

eru 16y ago
> 3. Save. Save, save, save. 10% of your money saved on a regular basis now is a huge relief in the future. I wish I'd enforced this on myself a bit better in the 20's .. you simply cannot avoid the fact that if you save during your most productive years, your least productive years will be better off for it .. I just got my first a few months ago and opted to save more than 20% of my gross income (tax-free, you pay taxes when you get it out later). I wasn't used to the money anyway, yet, so it was easy. Also, if you are not saving already: I guess whenever you get a raise, you can comfortably afford to save like 50% of it--because that money isn't planned into your budget, yet.
- derwiki 16y ago
  One step further: if you get a raise, take all of the associated money and save it. The standard of living you're used to will stay the same.
  - eru 16y ago
    If you can do pull it off, do so. I might even try it myself. But saving "only" 50% of your raises is something everybody can do without too much discipline, and still feel rewarded with a higher standard of living for whatever they did to get the raise. (Unless it's an automatic raise, and not something you got for some achievement.)
ido 16y ago
1. If you want to have kids, do it sooner rather than later. My issue is that kids cost a lot of money, which means you lose quite a lot of flexibility. I want to start my own business within the foreseeable future (probably 1-2 years, currently saving money, gathering contacts and getting more on-the-job experience in the field I want to operate in). Right now I know that if I save 20k Euros that could easily last me for well over a year, if you have kids - not so much. EDIT: I'm 27 and have tried doing my own thing that didn't work so well in the past - that 'failure' taught me I should probably get more experience and contacts before trying again. Saving 20-30k Euros (or more) is not the issue and is a sum I can relatively easily gather in a 1-2 years time-frame.
- portman 16y ago
  I have a 3 year old, a 2 year old, an 8 week old, and a startup. Having kids has no impact on having your own business. They're completely orthogonal. Using that as an excuse for not having kids makes as much sense as saying "I don't want to eat tacos for dinner because I want to have my own business." Note: I'm not responding directly to your comment; I'm responding to the somewhat pervasive idea on HN that kids are a substitute for startups.
  - modoc 16y ago
    "Having kids has no impact on having your own business" You're saying that raising children has no impact on your available time and money? That seems a bit far fetched. I'd agree that it's totally possible to have kids and do a startup, but frankly you'll be working with a bit less money and less time (and for a while way less sleep).
    - dagw 16y ago
      It very much depends on how you and the mother decided to split up the work load. If she is happy taking close to 100% of the work load and letting you do your thing then it shouldn't be impossible to have basically the same amount of time.
bd 16y ago
1. If you want to have kids, do it sooner rather than later. Having kids later is like letting them time travel to the future. I'm glad my parents had me late.
- Tichy 16y ago
  Unless there comes a new ice age and people start fighting all over the place for food and shelter, or whatever. Let's hope it won't come to that - but anyway, the future might not always just be new versions of iPhones. I think we are actually one of the first generations that never had to experience a war in their home country (speaking from my countries perspective). That said, I am also curious about the future and hope to experiences as much of it as possible...

by torpor 16y ago

eru 16y ago

> 3. Save. Save, save, save. 10% of your money saved on a regular basis now is a huge relief in the future. I wish I'd enforced this on myself a bit better in the 20's .. you simply cannot avoid the fact that if you save during your most productive years, your least productive years will be better off for it .. I just got my first a few months ago and opted to save more than 20% of my gross income (tax-free, you pay taxes when you get it out later). I wasn't used to the money anyway, yet, so it was easy. Also, if you are not saving already: I guess whenever you get a raise, you can comfortably afford to save like 50% of it--because that money isn't planned into your budget, yet.

derwiki 16y ago
One step further: if you get a raise, take all of the associated money and save it. The standard of living you're used to will stay the same.
- eru 16y ago
  If you can do pull it off, do so. I might even try it myself. But saving "only" 50% of your raises is something everybody can do without too much discipline, and still feel rewarded with a higher standard of living for whatever they did to get the raise. (Unless it's an automatic raise, and not something you got for some achievement.)

ido 16y ago

1. If you want to have kids, do it sooner rather than later. My issue is that kids cost a lot of money, which means you lose quite a lot of flexibility. I want to start my own business within the foreseeable future (probably 1-2 years, currently saving money, gathering contacts and getting more on-the-job experience in the field I want to operate in). Right now I know that if I save 20k Euros that could easily last me for well over a year, if you have kids - not so much. EDIT: I'm 27 and have tried doing my own thing that didn't work so well in the past - that 'failure' taught me I should probably get more experience and contacts before trying again. Saving 20-30k Euros (or more) is not the issue and is a sum I can relatively easily gather in a 1-2 years time-frame.

portman 16y ago
I have a 3 year old, a 2 year old, an 8 week old, and a startup. Having kids has no impact on having your own business. They're completely orthogonal. Using that as an excuse for not having kids makes as much sense as saying "I don't want to eat tacos for dinner because I want to have my own business." Note: I'm not responding directly to your comment; I'm responding to the somewhat pervasive idea on HN that kids are a substitute for startups.
- modoc 16y ago
  "Having kids has no impact on having your own business" You're saying that raising children has no impact on your available time and money? That seems a bit far fetched. I'd agree that it's totally possible to have kids and do a startup, but frankly you'll be working with a bit less money and less time (and for a while way less sleep).
  - dagw 16y ago
    It very much depends on how you and the mother decided to split up the work load. If she is happy taking close to 100% of the work load and letting you do your thing then it shouldn't be impossible to have basically the same amount of time.

bd 16y ago

1. If you want to have kids, do it sooner rather than later. Having kids later is like letting them time travel to the future. I'm glad my parents had me late.

Tichy 16y ago
Unless there comes a new ice age and people start fighting all over the place for food and shelter, or whatever. Let's hope it won't come to that - but anyway, the future might not always just be new versions of iPhones. I think we are actually one of the first generations that never had to experience a war in their home country (speaking from my countries perspective). That said, I am also curious about the future and hope to experiences as much of it as possible...